A couple of days ago, I hear a scream from the front yard. Fred (4) is on the ground and Sweetie-Pie-Baby-Girl (<2) is standing over him brandishing a two-foot stick she found in the yard.
Mind you, this is pretty normal.
Anyway, I'm bringing out the trash so we can get ready to go to my nephew's graduation party and I'm feeling a little cheeky, so I grab SPBG (TM), throw her over my shoulder and threaten to throw her into the dumpster (while tickling her the whole way, of course, 'cause that's how we roll). All of a sudden, it's like Lord of the Flies or that scene from Jurassic Park 2 when the little girl is on the beach surrounded by those cute little dinosaurs. I've got boys from three sides of me protecting their little sister, whaling on my legs, slapping, kicking, head-butting. Fred, the aforementioned victim of assault, throws his head back and starts crying, "NOOO!!! I don't have another sister like her!!!!! Don't throw her away!"
Tears are streaming down his face and I realize the joke is over. I put the little Hoolagirl down and crouch down to Fred's level. "Don't worry," I said, "I'd never throw your sister away. I was only joking."
"Oh! [sniff, sniff]. You were only joking? Thank goodness. OK." [sniff]
Meanwhile, Fric (7) and Frac (6) are continuing to practice every kickboxing move they can think of on my back and legs. I spin around and grab Fric, the first kid I can reach. "BUT THIS GUY IS GOING IN HEAD FIRST!"
And Fred throws his fist in the air and screams, "Yeah!"
"If you get to Heaven, it's by God's grace. If you go to Hell, it's your own damned fault." This is a blog by some guy trying to be a better Catholic despite his well-honed ability to get in the way of the Gospel. Thanks for reading this blog, it might be worth some time off of Purgatory.
Monday, July 18, 2011
5 comments:
Welcome to my combox. Trolls are not allowed. If you do not have a blogger ID or OpenID, etc, sign in with "Name/ URL" or "Anonymous."
I've decided to allow posting without moderation to encourage discussion; hopefully that won't have to change. Therefore, be aware that I may not necessarily agree with any of the comments others have made.
We may discuss adult subjects, but vulgar language and pornographic comments will be deleted. Disagreements between readers are OK, but this site aims to be faithful to the teaching of the Catholic faith and all commenters should keep that in mind.
Like Mark Shea says, conduct yourselves as if you're in my living room.
Oh, and by the way, sales pitches will be shown the trash can.
Love it! Who says chivalry is dead Honey? Heheheh:)
ReplyDeleteHilarious and so, so perfectly true about siblings! Thanks for sharing. :)
ReplyDeleteI love how the boys run to protect their sister! True sibling love!
ReplyDeleteI like Fred. :)
ReplyDeleteInnocent children believe everything, just like St. Paul. There is no guile in children, for them it was real.
ReplyDelete